update 4/14/05

[ja3kfd 34]

Dear Family and Friends,

Jimboy is doing well. He lost a pound this week, but we feel that he is leveling off. We will see what next week brings. He is truly such an incredible inspiration - there are no words to describe what it is like to have such an incredibly strong person and spirit in my life. I am blessed by having such a beautiful family.

For many years, I have been joked to and judged about having so many children and most of the joke and judgement has come out of my own mouth. I often questioned myself about having so many children. I even internally beat myself up and felt guilty at times. I know people just didn't understand or were concerned about us, but I am here to tell you now I understand why. It is bigger than me and all of us. I have learned so many lessons from these beautiful children of mine. I would not trade these experiences for anything. The love definitely over powers any other feeling in my life. As they grow, I realize what good people they are and will become. These beautiful children have helped me grow into the person I am and continue to want to be. I want them to "get it", to share, to care and spread there love with those in need at any given time. It really does all start to fall in place the way it is supposed to. When I wake up in the morning these days, I embrace what God has in store for me this day. I am really trying to live and love for the moment. I take what I call "my deep breath of life" to remind myself that I am living and I have a lot of work to get done. The path is already set, I just follow it the best I can, enjoy the good times, wade through the bad times and just pray that I am doing the best I can do. So, now I know that this is my path, and I am so comfortable with it. I will just keep learning from this journey. I never question or ask why. It may never make sense, but so far, I get it. I hope so many learn from our experiences with our family, maybe in some way it will spare some of you the pain and heartbreak we have felt through the years. Maybe just knowing about Jimboy will remind us all about what is important - I pray, but I can say I do get endless emails and cards that tell me that just knowing us and Jimboy has made a difference in their thinking - please continue to use our path and experiences to share your life and love with others. You all have been such a gift from God to our family, and we are so incredibly thankful for every person that we have in our life. So for me tonight, give your children and others a little moment of love. It is love that holds us together.

My feelings are very strong today. Jessica has had some more seizures, and will be coming home on Thursday the 21st for an MRI and EEG at Westchester Medical on the 22nd. I am very nervous about this, but continue to remind myself that we will get through this too. I feel guilty sometimes that I am not there with her. I still know this is what she needed to grow up, but it still hurts without her. So please give us a few extra prayers this week.

Well my family and friends, I hope I did not hold you hostage with my thoughts for today. Just remember, people remember you for how you make the feel, I say this to myself quite a few times each day and my new Oprah saying "There are no Coincidences." So with that said, I love you each and every one and thank you all for your constant prayers, support and love. Keep praying for all of us, as every night I pray for all of you and thank God for you and your miracles you give to our family. I love you.

Much love and God Bless You and Your Families, Gina & Family